Browse Professor Quotes
"If you found out that someone you were sleeping with had fucked a goat, would that be a dealbreaker or would you stay with them?"
—Prof. Greenspan, during a discussion on bestiality in the middle ages
It doesn't matter: true, false, whatever.
—Professor Sarah Stebbins, while teaching Logic
I gave you a D as a gift.
—Professor Wheelock, Sci-Fi: (In the remarks for a paper)
The hypothalamus is crucial in the role of the four F's...fighting, fleeing, feeding and....reproduction.
—Jennifer Hampsted Intro to Psych Lecture
The problem with the world today are the unbaptized babies and virtuous pagans, they are filling up limbo (the space between heaven and the earth). Professor Goldensohn
—Commentary on a poem by William Butler Yates
We are all very cautious about who we let into our backsides
—Professor Walzer, Individual in Society, said while discussing the front side and back sides of our self schemas.
Pay attention. I may say something very stupid once in a while.
—Distiniguished Visiting Professor Harry van der Hulst
Nothing compares to secret french orgasm chocolate
—Professor Flip Phillips, during a Statistics lecture
...Just smoke the damn pipe and get on with the interview.
—Prof. Stange in a Religion and Culture lecture about Black Elk's interview with an author
I...I mean it would taste like fried cat's asshole...
—Professor Solomon, LS1 lecture
They would have amorous escapades with sheep. I get it, masturbation, date sheep, ask girl out.
—Professor Solomon, Intro to Psych, telling story of football players at his college who while discussing the topic of girls, mentioned they had sex with sheep, and that is was normal. He related this to hidden desires within dreams.
A form of punishment would be if I threatened to shove refried cat's assholes with cheese down my kids throat until he practiced the viola
—Professor Solomon, Psychology 201: (During Lecture on Classical and Operant conditioning)